Note 020
You know I can’t help myself.
There I was, minding my business, scrolling through YouTube Shorts, when a woman said something that made this overthinker stop the video.
Not rewind it.
Pause it.
Grab my notebook.
And write it down.
Because I knew there was a note in there somewhere.
She was talking about a previous relationship and why it ended.
She said her partner looked at her one day and said,
“You want to be right more than you want to win.”
Ouch.
I’m not going to lie.
That one stung me too.
She went on to say that although the relationship eventually ended, those words stayed with her. Instead of becoming defensive, she decided to reflect.
She asked herself if there was any truth in what he said.
She realized that one sentence became the catalyst for changing how she showed up—not just in relationships, but in every area of her life.
And there I was…
Overthinking again.
Because I don’t think that statement is only about marriage or dating.
I think it’s about life.
How many times do we fight so hard to prove a point that we lose sight of what’s actually important?
We want to win the argument.
We want the last word.
We want someone to admit we were right.
But what if being right costs you your peace?
What if it costs you a friendship?
What if it costs you an opportunity?
What if it costs you growth?
Now, before anyone says, “Well, sometimes I am right.”
Of course you are.
Sometimes I am too.
That’s not the point.
The point is asking ourselves,
“What am I trying to accomplish here?”
Am I trying to prove something…
Or am I trying to build something?
Those are two very different goals.
The older I get, the more I realize that growth often begins with uncomfortable questions.
Questions like…
Could they be right about me?
Is there something I need to work on?
Is my pride getting in the way?
Those aren’t easy questions.
But they’re necessary ones.
Sometimes the very thing we’re holding on to is the very thing holding us back.
Maybe it’s pride.
Maybe it’s control.
Maybe it’s always needing to have the final say.
Maybe it’s refusing to apologize.
Maybe it’s refusing to listen.
Growth doesn’t always require us to do more.
Sometimes it requires us to let go.
That’s what I took away from that one little sentence.
Not because I know that woman’s story.
Not because I know whether her relationship should have worked.
But because there was a lesson hidden inside her experience.
And that’s the note I wanted to pass on.
A Note for Today
Sometimes the greatest victory isn’t proving you’re right. It’s becoming the kind of person who’s willing to grow.
A Little Something to Think About…
Is there something you’ve been holding on to simply because you don’t want to let it go? Ask yourself this week: “Is this helping me win at life…or just helping me win an argument?”
Until the next note,
Your Resident Overthinker