Overthinker’s Notes

"A collection of thoughts, growth, and gentle reminders inspired by everyday conversations, life experiences, and meaningful moments."

  • Just Because the Content Finds You Doesn’t Mean It’s About You

    Note 004

    Can I share another overthinker observation?

    Lately, I’ve noticed something.

    Ever since I turned 40, my social media feeds have completely changed.

    Suddenly I’m seeing…

    “Things no one tells you about turning 40.”

    “Signs you’re in perimenopause.”

    “Makeup mistakes women over 40 make.”

    “Skincare for mature skin.”

    “Five things every woman over 40 needs.”

    And while some of that information can absolutely be helpful, I’ve also started noticing something else.

    Turning 40 has become a content niche.

    Now before anyone gets defensive, hear me out.

    I’m not saying the creators are wrong.

    I’m not saying women don’t experience changes.

    We absolutely do.

    Our bodies change.

    Our hormones change.

    Our skin changes.

    Life changes.

    But here’s what I’ve learned.

    Just because you’re 40 doesn’t automatically mean every piece of “over 40” content applies to you.

    Every woman’s body is different.

    Every woman’s hormones are different.

    Every woman’s skin is different.

    Every woman’s experience is different.

    I’ve even had conversations with women younger than me who are convinced they’re in perimenopause because of something they watched online.

    Maybe they are.

    Maybe they aren’t.

    The point is, social media can sometimes make us believe we’re experiencing things before we’ve even stopped to ask if they’re actually true for us.

    I catch myself doing it too.

    I’ll watch a video and think,

    “Wait… should I be worried about that?”

    Then I have to remind myself…

    Just because someone is talking about it doesn’t mean it’s my reality.

    One thing I’ve learned over the years is to filter what I consume.

    Not reject it.

    Filter it.

    Take what makes sense.

    Leave what doesn’t.

    If something resonates with you, great.

    If it helps you, wonderful.

    If it encourages you to ask better questions or have a conversation with your doctor, that’s valuable too.

    But don’t let every video convince you something is wrong with you simply because you reached a certain birthday.

    Age is not a diagnosis.

    And social media is not your personal medical chart.

    The older I get, the more I realize that wisdom isn’t believing everything you hear.

    Wisdom is learning how to filter it.

    So if you’re in your 40s like me, here’s my encouragement.

    Learn.

    Stay curious.

    Take care of yourself.

    Ask questions.

    But don’t let the algorithm tell you who you are.

    You know your body better than a 60-second video ever could.

    A Note for Today

    Not every piece of content is meant for you. Take what serves you, question what doesn’t, and trust yourself enough to know the difference.

    Until the next note,

    Your Resident Overthinker

  • I Think I Finally Understand What It Means to Be Present

    Note 003

    As I’ve gotten older, especially over the last couple of years, I’ve noticed a shift in my mindset.

    I can’t do what I used to do.

    And honestly?

    I don’t want to.

    For example, I used to be the queen of multitasking.

    I’d be cooking dinner while listening to a podcast.

    Folding laundry while watching YouTube.

    Cleaning the bathroom while mentally planning tomorrow.

    Vacuuming while listening to someone’s advice about how to optimize my life.

    You know, all the things we tell ourselves we’re supposed to do.

    We’re being productive.

    Making good use of our time.

    Getting more done.

    At least that’s what I thought.

    A few years ago, I had a little health scare.

    Nothing major, thankfully.

    I was having some heart palpitations and other symptoms that got my attention. I went through the testing, wore the monitors, and everything came back fine.

    But if you’re an overthinker, you already know what happened next.

    The doctors stopped thinking about it.

    I did not.

    I analyzed.

    I replayed.

    I worried.

    I investigated.

    I had entire conversations with myself.

    Then one day I was talking to my mom and said, “You know what? I think I’m just going to slow down.”

    Not because anyone told me to.

    Because I wanted to.

    I realized I was constantly trying to do three things at once.

    Cook dinner.

    Do laundry.

    Clean the kitchen.

    Answer a text.

    Listen to a podcast.

    Learn something new.

    Be productive.

    And somehow relax at the same time.

    No wonder I felt overwhelmed.

    So I made a decision.

    If I’m cooking, I’m cooking.

    If I’m doing laundry, I’m doing laundry.

    If I’m cleaning, I’m cleaning.

    One task.

    One moment.

    One thing at a time.

    And surprisingly, it wasn’t difficult.

    It was a relief.

    A huge relief.

    I felt calmer.

    Less stressed.

    Less anxious.

    And here’s the funny part.

    I actually got more done.

    Not less.

    More.

    Because I wasn’t mentally scattered across five different activities.

    I was fully engaged in one.

    What started in my daily chores slowly spilled into other areas of my life.

    And now I’ve noticed something else.

    I can no longer work while listening to a podcast or YouTube video.

    I know people do it all the time.

    But I can’t.

    Soft jazz?

    Sure.

    Spa music?

    Absolutely.

    But if someone is talking, teaching, explaining, or sharing information, my brain wants to listen.

    I want to understand it.

    Learn from it.

    Think about it.

    And if I’m working, I want to focus on the work.

    Finish the task.

    Be present with what I’m doing.

    For a while, I thought something was wrong with me.

    Why can’t I listen and work like everyone else?

    Then it hit me.

    Maybe this is what people mean when they talk about living intentionally.

    Maybe this is what being present actually looks like.

    Not rushing through every moment.

    Not consuming information every second of the day.

    Not constantly splitting your attention.

    Just being where you are.

    Doing what you’re doing.

    Experiencing the moment you’re in.

    I think I finally get it now.

    Presence isn’t about meditation cushions and perfect morning routines.

    Sometimes it’s as simple as washing dishes while you’re washing dishes.

    Listening while you’re listening.

    Working while you’re working.

    Living while you’re living.

    A Note for Today

    You don’t have to fill every moment. Sometimes being fully present in one thing is enough.

    Until the next note,

    Your Resident Overthinker

  • Everyone Doesn’t Deserve Daily Access

    Note 002

    I was listening to a YouTube video about introverts the other day.

    And yes, before you ask, I am a proud, self-admitted introvert.

    I suppose that goes hand in hand with being an overthinker.

    There I go again, overthinking and analyzing.

    Anyway, the speaker said something that stopped me and had me pause the video to write down what he said next:

    “Everyone doesn’t deserve daily access.”

    Now, if you’re an introvert, you probably just nodded your head.

    The speaker mentioned that he’s been learning about introverts because he married one. He explained that introverts aren’t necessarily antisocial. We don’t dislike people. We simply tend to be intentional about who gets our time, energy, and attention.

    That quote followed me around all day.

    Because if I’m being honest, I’ve been thinking about this for years.

    In fact, it reminds me of why I got rid of my smartwatch over five years ago.

    Now before anyone comes for me, let me explain.

    My husband had one. Everyone seemed to have one. I was walking daily and thought, “I should probably track my steps too.”

    You know, the same reason many of us buy things.

    Because everyone else has one and suddenly it feels like we need one too.

    So I got the watch.

    At first, it seemed convenient.

    Text messages on my wrist.

    Emails on my wrist.

    Notifications on my wrist.

    The weather on my wrist.

    Someone sneezing three states away probably could have appeared on my wrist.

    But after a while, I realized something.

    I was annoyed.

    Constantly.

    The watch buzzed.

    I looked down.

    The watch buzzed again.

    I looked down again.

    Someone sent an email.

    Buzz.

    A text.

    Buzz.

    A notification I didn’t need.

    Buzz.

    Before long, I realized I was allowing every person, app, company, and random notification immediate access to me all day long.

    And honestly?

    It felt exhausting.

    One of my biggest pet peeves to this day is when someone looks down at their watch or phone in the middle of a conversation.

    I know we’ve normalized it.

    I know technology makes it possible.

    But it still feels rude.

    If we’re talking, be here.

    Not halfway here and halfway checking notifications.

    Maybe that’s the introvert in me.

    Or maybe it’s just basic respect.

    The deeper issue, though, wasn’t the watch.

    The watch simply revealed something bigger.

    How did we get to a place where everyone expects immediate access to everyone?

    A text comes in.

    Respond.

    An email arrives.

    Respond.

    A notification pops up.

    Respond.

    Immediately.

    Right now.

    No delay.

    No boundaries.

    No patience.

    And if you don’t respond quickly enough, somehow you’re the problem.

    I remember telling my husband years ago that I didn’t like that expectation.

    No one should have instant access to you at all times.

    That doesn’t make you unavailable.

    It makes you human.

    Most things are not emergencies.

    Most emails can wait.

    Most text messages can wait.

    Most questions can wait.

    And surprisingly enough, sometimes people can even solve their own problems if they don’t receive an immediate response.

    Imagine that.

    Somewhere along the way, we’ve confused accessibility with obligation.

    Just because someone can reach you doesn’t mean they are entitled to your attention at that exact moment.

    Boundaries are healthy.

    Silence is healthy.

    Time to think before responding is healthy.

    And perhaps that’s one thing introverts understand naturally.

    Not everyone deserves daily access.

    Not because we’re selfish.

    Not because we’re antisocial.

    But because our time, energy, attention, and peace are valuable.

    And if we’re not careful, we’ll give them away to everyone else before we’ve saved any for ourselves.

    A Note for Today

    Just because someone can reach you doesn’t mean they are entitled to your immediate attention.

    Until the next note,

    Your Resident Overthinker

  • Why I Started Overthinkers Notes

    Note 001

    I’ve always lived in my head.

    I analyze. I overthink. I replay conversations. I notice details that most people seem to miss. A single sentence can stay with me for days. Sometimes even years.

    I’ve never been the person who only listens to what someone says. I’m paying attention to the words they choose, the tone they use, the pause before they answer, and the meaning hidden between the lines.

    A good quote can stop me in my tracks.

    It might come from a reality TV star, an athlete, a news anchor, a child, or a complete stranger. One sentence can make me think differently about my own life, and once it does, I can’t help but carry it with me.

    That’s how Overthinkers Notes was born.

    This space is a collection of the thoughts, lessons, stories, and reminders I’ve gathered throughout life. Some came from raising children. Some came from twenty years of marriage. Others came from conversations I’ll never forget.

    One of those conversations happened when I was 21 years old.

    My father had recently passed away. I was in college and suddenly found myself trying to navigate things I knew nothing about. I remember speaking with someone from his HR department, asking questions and trying to figure out what I needed to do next.

    It didn’t take long for her to realize I was overwhelmed.

    She stopped me in the middle of the conversation and said something that has stayed with me for more than twenty years.

    “Let me tell you something. If you act like you don’t know and don’t sound confident, you’re going to get nowhere. You have to speak confidently. Act like you know what you’re talking about. If you want people to listen and if you want to get what you need, you have to believe in yourself first.”

    At the time, I needed help with paperwork.

    What she really gave me was a life lesson.

    Over the years, I’ve discovered that her words apply to almost everything. Job interviews. Marriage. Parenting. Friendships. Business. Life.

    Confidence doesn’t mean knowing everything.

    It means trusting yourself enough to take the next step even when you don’t have all the answers.

    I’ve carried that lesson with me ever since.

    And that’s exactly what you’ll find here.

    Not perfect advice. Not expert opinions.

    Just notes from a woman who pays attention, learns from everyday moments, and believes that some of life’s greatest lessons come from ordinary conversations.

    If you’re an overthinker, welcome.

    And if you’re not, you’re welcome here too.

    I hope something you read here gives you a thought to reflect on, a lesson to carry with you, or a gentle reminder exactly when you need it.

    A Note For Today: Confidence isn’t knowing all the answers. It’s trusting yourself enough to take the next step.

    Until the next note,
    Your Resident Overthinker